Okay before you get all self righteous and say “Oh, don’t be
so down on yourself, your not fat.” Here is the deal….in my head, I don’t really
think that I am fat. My brain thinks that I am a reasonably medium- sized
person. The problem is all the damn mirrors, and the cameras...Sometimes, I look into a mirror or look at a
photo of myself, and wonder who is looking back at me. Where is the tolerably
curvy gal I think I am, and who the hell is this chunky b%tch????
Its not just me either. When I go into stores and I have to
buy a large (or sometimes an X-Large), its really hard to feel good about that.
You every wonder…..if I am an X-Large, what do truly “large” people
wear. That being said, I have decided
that clothing companies are ridiculous. There is no reason I should be made to
feel big just because I have some meat on my bones.
Oh…and mirrors, those are ridiculous
too.
I have come up with some diet tips for anyone that is
interested. Before you inquire as to why you would want to take tips from
someone who openly admits to not being thin, let me clear this up. I am not
saying that I actually do any of these things. I’m just saying that I know how
to lose weight if I want to. Every day I don’t lose weight, I like to look at
like a conscious choice on my part. You know why I didn't lose a pound this week…BECAUSE
I DIDN’T WANT TO! That’s right. If I had wanted to lose a pound , I would have
done it. You know that’s right, because I have O’Nan blood in me and we O’Nan
women do what we want to do J
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| We O"Nan women do whatever we want! |
- . Forget the word diet- its depressing, and I actually get hungry when I say it, so just don’t
- Think about it like math
- You burn a certain number of calories in a day based on your activity level, sex, height, weight, and exercise. THERE IS NOT SOME SECRET FORMULA TO LOSING WEIGHT! As long as you don’t eat more than you burn, you will lose.
- You can calculate your Resting Metabolic Rate online, then add to that the calories you burn from exercise. If you are super anal like I am, you can get a tracker. I personally love my Fitbit Force. It keeps up with a rough estimate of how many calories I burn a day.
- LOG YOUR FOOD!
- I can not stress this enough. Even if you only do it for a short period of time, I think you must get a feel for how many calories the foods that you eat have in them. You would be totally shocked that some items have so many calories. Like a blizzard from dairy queen can be up to 1200 calories. Hell, that about a days worth of calories for me.
- First just log the food that you would normally eat without trying to cut back any. I guarantee 99.9% of all people underestimate the number of calories they actually eat in a day. I would up that number to 100% of people if those people eat out at restaurants at all. Apparently everything made at a restaurant is dipped in sugar and fat before its put on your plate. No wonder its so good!
- I use the App MyFitnessPal to log my food. There are some other ones out there, but I think this one is pretty good and its Free. (See Josh, not everything I do cost money.) Its so much harder to put food in your mouth when you know you have to log it. Its kind of kills the buzz you get from slamming a fudge round into your piehole!
- Start slow
- a. Weight that comes off quickly also comes back on quickly. That being said, the only thing worse an being fat, is being skinny, then getting fat again. So do it slowly. Try to aim to lose only ½ a pound to a pound a week. That way you won’t starve, and you will see that it is doable.
- Manage your expectations
- The first 2 weeks suck. No getting around it. You will be hungry, and cranky, and probably not any skinnier. You will want to give up. Schedule yourself a non food related reward for completing the first 2 weeks. Admit to others you are hangry. Its okay, they will understand. If they don't, screw em.
- Only weigh once a week
- Weighing daily makes me homicidal. It fluctuates too much. Pick a day of the week and only weigh that day, first thing in the morning. Log your weight either on paper or in an App like the MyFitnessPal Program. Resist desire to weigh on any other scale, at any other time of the day, or any extra days between weigh-ins. Trust me people, I'm not cut out for jail.
- Exercise
- Let me put a disclaimer on this one…. I really don’t enjoy excercising. I like it just about as much as I like manual labor, sweating, or the Turkey Trots. The only reason I exercise is so that I can eat more. I wasn’t cut out to starve. By exercise, I, in no way, shape, or form mean running. Running is so cliché. Everyone these days want to slap on some damn Underarmour gear and trot around like they have been doing marathons their whole lives. Then they post it on Facebook for me to feel like the only inadequate chunky non-runner left on the planet. Truth of the matter is, walking can be just as effective and I think it’s a hell of a lot less intimidating. I will never have those little stickers on the back of my vehicle that say “13.1” or “26.0.” I might, however, can a custom decal that says, “0…because running flairs up my fat girl asthma, but I can walked like a beast!”
- Skip diet pills and supplements
- I’m not saying they don’t work or at least help, but I think that it leads to this mentality that you have to have help to lose weight. If you start thinking about weight loss as some grand mystery that you are never going to solve without help, it will never become a reality for you.
- Prove to yourself that you can do it if you want to, without any help. I promise it will empower you and make you want to lose weight...just because you can, D@mn IT!
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| Its just an equation really! |
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